The picture that will break many hearts....

I know for sure that this pictures is going to break your heart. At first sight, you might not even understand it. Then suddenly, it will hit you like it hit me, and when a blast of images start rushing into your mind of those nights,days, mornings, you too will be thrown into a silenced grief.

This picture was taken on the 4th of April, 2009 by Areeba Kamran, and it is of the RED dormitory. It saddened me. I can still see my bed there-and the white curtains that separated my cubicle from the next girls. I think of the time when coincidently, my entire group of friends got beds next to each other( a big mistake on the nuns part!)-a stretch of 6 or 7 beds. We would always have the middle curtains pushed back in the afternoons and get into trouble. Now, one of my happiest memories is turning into one of sadness. I can hear those basins, and Sister Clotilda's morning bell. I can even hear footsteps on those wooden floors. I can see the girls in their cubicles, getting ready for bed. I can still hear some whispering after the lights are out-and even the distant sound of muffled music from some girls walkman. i can still see the girls hurrying about, changing for games time. So much movement but absolute silence because sister Clotildas presence is enough. Yes, i can still see her there, standing in a corner, looking at any movement through the corner of her glasses, knitting,knitting,knitting...

Its strange how fast everything that seemed to exist so permanently, fades into non existence...

This picture is indeed the sad reality of what has happened to our dear boarding school...If only realities werent so empty and harsh..

You can click on the picture for larger view

Miss Tabinda's passing

miss Tabinda died at 5pm at CMH Murree of Cardiac Arrest & brain Haemorrhage on the 9th of March 2008. May her soul rest in peace. Please leave your thoughts here...

Losing Sister Clotilda

On November 19th,2007, Sister Clotilda passed away during her sleep.
Sister Clotilda, the eternal ruler of the entire senior dorms. The one to introduce all of us to the word "brazier", the one to ring that wretched 6am morning bell, the one who could recall every student by name years after their graduating, remains no more. I suppose with the closing of the boarding school, the purpose of her life which she served for over 50 years, had come to an end.
I believe she has been at Murree convent since at least partition and had come from India.
Whenever you hear the word "infirmory" and think of that horrible red medicine in those huge bottles, she is probably the first person to come to mind.

Her memory span never ceases to amaze me..how she can recall every single student's name from the past 50 years AND recognize them even after decades is simply an amazement to me. She should be put in the guiness book of world records and a wax figure of hers should be in madame tussauds!

Dear Sister,the convent would not be the place that it is without you. Had the boarding school not shut down, and u had gone earlier than you did, the entire instituion would have suffered much. Without you, there would have been no character to the school. You played such an integral part in the formation of so many peoples lives...you will be missed much and will always be remembered. I really wonder though about who you would be torturing with that wretched bell of ures now that ure up there in heaven!

I truely wish she had seen her end at Murree and was buried at the cemetery there. She of all the people deserves to have that as her final resting place. It was probably the only place she called home.
Leave your thoughts here for her...may her soul find eternal peace.
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the ghost of CJM...

As August ends this year, the pride of our early years, the boarding of CJM Murree, halts in its existence. Some, will lose an entire childhood and with it, their deepest, fondest memories will crumble to dust.


Yes, there will still be laughter of children on that flat and the sound of that school bell will still be heard, but dreadfully none of it will be the same as before. Our memories will become the ghost of our past. We have lost the opportunity to relive those precious experiences forever. All we have left to go back to are empty halls and silenced dorms. Of course, the flat exists but without the tree. The dorms survive but without any basins or beds. The school remains but ends at half day. The walls still stand tall, but what lies within is unfamiliar and incomplete. All that we knew of cjm, our life which bonded us to countless generations behind us, will cease to exist.


O,how we laughed and sang on that flat after supper in that thick, July, fog. How we witnessed some of the most magnificent sunsets together, experienced the winter line with its many shades, that view of Islamabad at night and the suffering it brought to our hearts, the thunderous rain on those tin roofs, the smell of that boiler in winters…all gone. Imagine, sister clotildas agonizing morning bell not ringing in the morning anymore, the sounds of the night prayers not echoing though the halls, the whistles which were blown to send students to bed at night not heard ever again, a dining room without tables, the sounds of its students silenced forever.. This indeed is a sad ending.


Over 100 years of history are now simply a phantom , one which will survive in the minds of only those who experienced it. I suppose this is a conclusion which was never expected and which will hurts us all. Hence, I dedicate this month to our beloved boarding school. Funeral services will be held here. Please share your thoughts . RIP jand m.